Jane Ward just legitimized “No homo,” the excuse for any masculine straight dude who wishes to cup his buddy’s balls. Her new book Not Gay: Sex Between Straight White Men is a fascinating study of why heterosexual (white) men who have homosexual encounters don’t identify as gay. Lost? Then let her explain it on a very homoerotic Manwhore Podcast!
Whether it’s in a frat house, a military barracks or a Hell’s Angel club house, straight-identified white men are having homosexual experiences with other straight-identified men. Jane Ward discusses how their masculinity and whiteness allows opportunities to explore each other’s bodies without endangering their heterosexual identity. Not Gay makes sense of those Craigslist m4m ads of “Straight seeking Straight Jack Off Buddy.” “Look bro, if you can’t help a friend out by giving him a handjob then you’re kind of a fag!” – says he-man former frat boy.
#NotAllMen was a Twitter movement that angered many a feminist. I admit that I would prefer someone talking about “men,” “white people,” “straight people,” “comedians” to qualify their complaint with “assholes,” “misogynists,” “homophobes,” and “Republicans.” Ward helps me understand how to be a better ally while not letting myself be someone else’s privilege punching bag.
Ward gives an Intro to Intro to Feminism 101 by explaining intersectional feminism. Hopefully, we get to a point where we don’t need the separate term and all feminism is intersectional, according to my guest. The UC-Riverside associate professor reminds us that one woman’s experience is informed by not just her gender but her race, socioeconomic status and sexual orientation. So Patricia Arquette was right and wrong.
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This week’s episode is sponsored by glory holes. It’s not gay if you don’t know who’s on the other side.
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